I am going to be honest here despite my many protests to my close friends that 'I don't have one', I have to admit I have a problem with my image. Do not get me wrong I am not currently dialing the cosmetic surgeon as we speak ( I don't believe in plastic for vanity) but every Spring/Summer I find myself every morning and night staring at the mirror picking at my 'flaws'. Which if you want to know is currently my; back fat, pudgy cheeks, wobbly bum and thighs, and that double chin.
Is this vanity? I do not believe it is, because if I did I would spend a lot more time on my appearance (I am not one to get fussed over my hair and make-up). I believe it is an illness that most women suffer from - the idea that we are all supposed to be 'perfect'. It has been said that it is all due to the media's perception of women that causes these 'wobbly moments' of lack of self-belief and I do agree but I think there is more behind it.
I am a magazine addict openly and think nothing nothing about spending £5 on a fashion magazine but have to think twice about parting with £3 for a taxi ride home. From my early teens I have always been this way but I have evantually found refuge in the Elle's and Vogue's of this world rather than the heat and closer type magazines that litter the newsstands. My reasons for this are, firstly I want to know directly about fashion,secondly I don't really like real-life stories unless they are talking of fashion, and thirdly I do not want to read about sex and what's the new thing to do. However there is a fourth and final reason and that is everytime I pick up one of these magazines I feel quite depressed as every magazine seems to target the 'female flaws' and praise celebrities for losing a few pounds or stone (even if they looked better with it on).
I find this quite interesting as I can happily look at Vogue's models and read articles on people like Kate Moss and I never feel grotesquely unattractive, I can even sit down and read it with a big cup of tea and a big fattening mars bar and still it does not make me question myself.
I do think this is quite odd and there are probably a number of factors for why I feel this way but I am going to suggest it is how these high-end fashion magazines portray the individuals within their pages to look nothing but 'beautiful'. I have seen these magazines use plus-size models and to me they look the same as if they were Kate Moss because the photographer has celebrated the person in front of the lens rather than criticising it. Do not get me wrong I am not naive I know there is a thing called photoshop but it goes on everywhere and I don't think the main image is completely lost (I hope not anyway).
We need to celebrate who we are and all aim to show the beauty within and not aim for slutty, sexy, shy, fit or anything else we might be told we must be.
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